Disclaimer: All things are influenced. Even my own words. Nothing here on Earth is new with relation to the Sun. I borrow images, I capture images...I read...and I copy and paste some things and then I create things that are influence by all the energies around me.
Love is like...

Looking For

Tuesday, March 20, 2012


I have come back I think, I am internally debating if I should make a new blog site or stay committed to this one ...

Friday, November 25, 2011

i've successfully lost myself for a moment...

total mess-up
and everything around me is evident to that fact.
my life is out of order and this dangerous game
can't seem to bring it back
into play and everyday
i wish it would get a little better.
i was never the pessimestic one
and i have no intention of starting now..
why look down when there is no ending.
why look up when real friends be pretending.
i'll be the one to smile in your face and break off a piece of my soul
swallowing all signs of pain because this life has a toll
and i'm already in debt
so i'm sitting wondering
where is the funds going to come from?
i have very little feelable support and inspiration
no disrespect
i'm not so in to this capitalistic nation
my dreams and happiness has been misshapen
and the only place i can call a safe haven
has even been invaded
my heart was torn a part
in a vicious manner
and i have this tough interior that i can't picture letting down
crumbling over
some person i'm not too sure of
...and its not fair for you.
its really not fair for you.
because you, you deserve someone a little better.
a little more patience.
a little more willing.
a little less paranoid.
a little less accusing.
a little more affectionate.
a little more capable.
a little less cruel.
a little more pleasant.
i'm not the one for you.
and i sometimes wish i was,
to know i can be comfortable in a place forever is so warming.
but the title of forever is a big red flashing warning.
you need a hand
and honestly i'm disabled...I gave so much of myself
too connected and i'm trying to cut the cables...
I need to find myself
and I need to do it fast.
This cold person all bruised up is not usually a jerk or an as-
astronmically, I have an ocean storm stirring up because I'm not being the moon
Im not gleaming with light and I'm feeling all doomed
but I promise if I find my self soon
and if you give me room
it would be for the best
and maybe we can always be cool.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Sunday, October 16, 2011

imissyouso mucho.



so in my mild madness I have re-created a FaceBook account..which will SURELY be deleted and very soon...
I just wanted to write up on how socially disconnected we re from society and our selves...but in order to really do that I must re-activate and recount my past experiences with my current one....

so ladies and gentleman, cats and dogs, peanut  butter and jam, I give you the FaceBook escapade.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

New Birth "Wildflower"

Babies will be conceived.
All of the Lights =]
I would probably lift off the ground and whirl into a fit of pleasure
I ever got to be

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Best Advice Yet =]

Wasn't feeling that high in spirits but this has just renewed my emotional state into plus signs<3


37 Things You Should Never Apologize For and Why- BY etiquette-inc

1. Never apologize for acting on your instincts.
 Listening to your body then taking action on what you hear
 is the hallmark of heroic people.
2. Never apologize for all the tears you’ve cried.
Crying cleanses the soul. Shoot for once a month.
Even if it’s just a brief mist at a tender moment in a sad movie.
3. Never apologize for anything in your resume/portfolio.
If you feel the need to do so, it probably doesn’t belong
in there in the first place.
4. Never apologize for asking for what you need.
The answer to every question you DON’T ask is always no.
5. Never apologize for asking questions.
 When you stop asking questions,
you don’t just run out of answers you run out of hope.
6. Never apologize for asserting yourself.
 The word assert comes from the Latin asserere, which means,
to claim, maintain or affirm. And that’s exactly what you’re entitled to: Your opinion. Your belief. Your say.
Let nobody take it away from you.
7. Never apologize for being a health nut.
Next time someone says, What are you, on a diet or something?
 look them straight in the eye and say,
Yeah you got a problem with that?
Then, when they back down, you go right back to eating your tofu.
8. Never apologize for being a newbie.
Every great chess master was once a beginner.
9. Never apologize for being early for an appointment.
In the history of Corporate America, no employee has ever been
 fired for consistently arriving ten minutes early to every meeting.
10. Never apologize for being funny.
The world is too damn serious. We need you. Seriously.
11. Never apologize for being human.
Once you do, you’re no longer human, you’re a cyborg.
12. Never apologize for being passionate.
Unless you’re passionate about stabbing strangers with
broken Coke bottles.
13. Never apologize for being smart.
 That’s the ONE thing the government, the media
 (and every other entity that’s trying to control you)
 is terrified of: Smart people who take action. Be one of those people.
14. Never apologize for being the age that you are.
It’s just a number. A chicken ain’t nothing but a bird, as my Grandpa likes to say.
15. Never apologize for breaking a rule that isn’t really a rule.
Be proud of yourself for being a rule breaker.
Then go break another one.
16. Never apologize for calling bullshit on someone.
Especially when nobody else is the room is going to do
 it and this person REALLY needs to be taken to task.
17. Never apologize for demanding respect.
If you’ve demonstrated that you deserve respect by giving it to others first, you’re good to go.
18. Never apologize for disagreeing.
Especially if you do so respectfully. On the other hand,
if you’re disagreeing for the sake of disagreeing,
or because of your pathological need to be right,
that’s a different story.
19. Never apologize for expressing yourself.
That’s all “leadership” is:
The full, free expression of your truth.
 Don’t say you’re sorry for that.
20. Never apologize for falling in love.
Your heart’s calling the shots.
21. Never apologize for falling OUT of love.
Your heart’s still calling the shots even when you throw up an air ball.
22. Never apologize for getting something off your chest.
That which you suppress will find a home in your body.
And then it will trash the place.
23. Never apologize for giving it your best shot.
 As my Grandpa also reminded me,
“You do the best you can with as many as you can.”
24. Never apologize for growing up privileged.
As long as you scrap the entitlement attitude,
remain grateful for everything you’ve ever been given
and respect the life situation of those who are less fortunate, it’s all good.
25. Never apologize for having an overabundance of love in your life.
Instead, circulate what you’ve got. Pay it forward.
Share it. People need it.
26. Never apologize for lack of experience.
Instead, share your Learning Plan; demonstrate
your dedication to lifelong learning and practice
becoming the world’s expert at learning from your experiences.
27. Never apologize for lack of information.
Ignorance is acceptable. Staying ignorant, however, is stupid.
28. Never apologize for liking stupid movies.
Movie snobs annoy me. Some of my favorite movies
are among the most ridiculous films ever made.
So I love Hangover. Sue me.
29. Never apologize for living your truth.
Few things in the world are more important.
30. Never apologize for looking out for yourself.
Self-preservation is a primary driver of human behavior.
 It’s how we’re wired.
31. Never apologize for loving yourself.
If you do, you probably don’t love yourself as much as you thought.
32. Never apologize for making a decision from the heart.
Remember: It’s not thee truth it’s YOUR truth.
33. Never apologize for needing alone time.
Solitude is soil. Solitude is medicine.
And if you don’t get your fix every day, your life will suffer.
34. Never apologize for needing to use the bathroom.
Yesterday a woman in my class walked out of the
room and actually said to the instructor,
I have to pee, I’m SO sorry. Unbelievable.
35. Never apologize for not being there when someone called.
You have a life, too. People can’t expect you to wait eagerly
by the phone all hours of the day.
36. Never apologize for not embracing someone else’s agenda.
Especially if that agenda robs you of your true talent.
37. Never apologize for occasional absentmindedness.
Everyone’s brain farts.


Enhances Concentration & Focus
Whether it is while studying or at work, the use of specific incenses enables clear thinking and helps in developing a state of complete awareness. Monks recognized this benefit of incense long ago and use it during their meditation to clear the air as well as their thoughts. Jewelry makers and other workers who require intense concentration also often use incense to help them focus and to switch back and forth between working under the microscope and working away from it.

Stimulates Creativity
Just as a good song or beautiful scenery can inspire the imagination, a pleasing aroma can get the creative juices flowing. The many botanical scents of incense can transport one’s mind away to a tropical island, a rainforest, a mountainous range, or any other earthly heaven. The scents of incense can put one in a dream like state where the imagination can run wild.

Increases Motivation
Incense has long been used by religious and spiritual leaders to purify the air and the soul. Certain incense smoke has antibacterial, fungicidal, and insecticidal properties and, therefore, really does purify the air. It is said that the incense increases positive energy and drives away negative energy. The pure air is like health food for the brain and the body, resulting in an increased motivation and energy level.

Boosts Confidence
With increased focus, creativity, and motivation naturally comes increased confidence. When your body is relaxed and your brain is firing on all cylinders, you’re at your best, and when you’re at your best, you’re at your most confident. Burning incense before a big date, a big test, or a big presentation can really increase your confidence and, therefore, your chances of success.

Incense can increase sexual desire and set the mood between two lovers.
Heightens Sexual Desire
Everyone knows that pheromones are nature’s aphrodisiac, which is why they are used in perfumes to attract the opposite sex. Similarly, by indulging the sense of smell, incense acts as a powerful aphrodisiac. The scents created by incense wet the sexual appetite and increase sexual attraction. Additionally, we’ve already covered that incense can boost confidence and enhance focus, and nothing attracts the opposite sex more than confidence and focus. Therefore, even if one were to use incense by himself and then meet up with his partner elsewhere, his increased confidence and focus will naturally turn his partner on. If a couple uses incense together, the smells will kick in the pheromone effect and they most likely will have a hard time keeping their hands off each other.

Prevents Infections
Many types of incense have antibacterial properties and can be used as a disinfectant to kill germs in the environment. In a recent Chinese study, incense was used to sterilize a hospital ward and was found to be just as effective as more standard means of sterilization such as using steam. By keeping your environment sterile, you can prevent infections and disease. Because many herbs, such as Myrrh, also act as antiseptics, gathering the smoke from certain types of incense and rubbing it over a wound may actually help the wound heal faster since the smoke can kill germs on the wound.

Relieves Headaches
Our sense of smell is a direct path to the brain and certain odors trigger an immediate response via the Limbic System. Particular aromas stimulate the brain to produce essential chemicals, such as serotonin and dopamine, which cause feelings of happiness, relaxation and contentment. For headache relief, certain incense aromas can help open the nasal passages, while others can lower blood pressure.

Fights Depression
In a new study an international team of scientists have discovered how burning frankincense (resin from the Boswellia plant) activates poorly understood ion channels in the brain that alleviate anxiety or depression. Incensole acetate, a Boswellia resin constituent, was administered to mice and found to stimulate TRPV3, a protein which helps reduce anxiety and depression symptoms. The compound significantly affected brain areas known to be involved in emotions as well as in nerve circuits that are affected by current anxiety and depression drugs.

Reduces Anxiety & Tension
The calming effects of incense are well known by Monks and spiritual leaders. Certain incense aromas work to slow down the heart rate and soothe nerves. These calming effects help to relieve built up tension in the muscles, enabling incense to also be used as a muscle relaxer.

Aids Insomnia
As a result of the calming effects of incense, incense can also be used to induce sleep. The sedative properties of incense make it a great natural treatment to aid insomnia.
Sri Chinmoy

Tuesday, September 6, 2011


In Celebration of the Beautiful...9/7/2011

How to Smile.

Be happy for life and  the moment that you have the opportunity to even partake in the experience of the smile. 

Realize for that moment you have the power and the glory to influence someone's day for the better.

Rejoice in the energy that explodes and settles throughout your being from the simplicity of a smile.....


“Always remember to slow down in life; live, breathe, and learn; take a look around you whenever you have time and never forget everything and every person that has the least place within your heart.”

On Love..

September 6th 2011

A rainy day.
The day before my one year lociverrsary.
The day that is numerically displayed as 09/06/2011.
A Tuesday.
The day where I have one morning class and I work up until 3pm.
The day where at midnight I second guess the fact that I am in a relationship.
The day I take a minute or so to sit down with my kittens and play with them.
The day I finally am a bit on track with Plato and his ideal Republic.
At least in my class.
The day before my Math Quiz#1.
The day before Wednesday, September 7th 2011.
23 days before my Birthday.

But most importantly the day I get to be alive...again...

I'm living.

Sunday, August 28, 2011





A tendency to think and act spontaneously rather than on fears based on past experiences.
An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment.
A loss of interest in judging other people.
A loss of interest in interpreting the actions of other.
A loss of interest in conflict.
A loss of the ability to worry.
Frequent, overwhelming episodes of appreciation.
Contented feelings of connectedness with others and nature.
An increasing tendency to let things happen rather than make them happen.

Life is...

full of things and yet so empty at the same time. Life is an expected surprise. My life has been blessed and tested through the Most High. Divine energy has always been in my favor no matter how selfish I may seem and get sometimes. At the end of the day....Positivity is always a step ahead of the negativity that lags behind my back.

This summer was really fun and the moments that were created in seconds and days will be in memory thats alive for the rest of my life.

Though one guy has hurt me and try to erase my happiness and joy ...there comes one more promising even more...=]
but before all of that

Shapel grew stronger in spirit and love for herself.
The only challenge I may have is the challenge of trying to let myself be in a relationship. I guess I am old enough , twenty basically. But a part of me just wants to float and not encounter any type of drama...but I am trying and I already promised to give someone a chance..an honest chance..I'm just wondering if I gave myself honest time to heal. :-\

School seems promising and very very busy yet productive. I have so many things I want to do and even more things that I need to do. What will be a greater blessing is fusing the two together so that the road is clear.....

I'm excited for new beginnings<3
I am thank ful and I am forever actively in love with Shapel and the life I possess.


Tuesday, August 23, 2011

I'm drinking tea right now and in a few hours literally I have to wake up so I need to hurry this up a bit and take a shower because the first day of college-o again is tomorrow...and boy the day ahead will be busy yet productive and overall blessed. I am in high hopes and positive vibes. Irie and Lively. <3

Monday, August 15, 2011

THE RULES FOR BEING HUMAN When you were born, you didn’t come with an owner’s manual; these guidelines make life work better.

Look what I found

1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it’s the only thing you are sure to keep for the rest of your life.

2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called “Life on Planet Earth”. Every person or incident is the Universal Teacher.

3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of experimentation. “Failures” are as much a part of the process as “success.”

4. A lesson is repeated until learned. It is presented to you in various forms until you learn it — then you can go on to the next lesson.

5. If you don’t learn easy lessons, they get harder. External problems are a precise reflection of your internal state. When you clear inner obstructions, your outside world changes. Pain is how the universe gets your attention.

6. You will know you’ve learned a lesson when your actions change. Wisdom is practice. A little of something is better than a lot of nothing.

7. “There” is no better than “here”. When your “there” becomes a “here” you will simply obtain another “there” that again looks better than “here.”

8. Others are only mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another unless it reflects something you love or hate in yourself.

9. Your life is up to you. Life provides the canvas; you do the painting. Take charge of your life — or someone else will.

10. You always get what you want. Your subconscious rightfully determines what energies, experiences, and people you attract — therefore, the only foolproof way to know what you want is to see what you have. There are no victims, only students.

11. There is no right or wrong, but there are consequences. Moralizing doesn’t help. Judgments only hold the patterns in place. Just do your best.

12. Your answers lie inside you. Children need guidance from others; as we mature, we trust our hearts, where the Laws of Spirit are written. You know more than you have heard or read or been told. All you need to do is to look, listen, and trust.

13. You will forget all this.

14. You can remember any time you wish.

(From the book “If Life is a Game, These are the Rules” by Cherie Carter-Scott)

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Prana (प्राण, prāṇa) is the Sanskrit word for "vital life" (from the root prā "to fill", cognate to Latin plenus "full"). It is one of the five organs of vitality or sensation, viz. prana "breath", vac "speech", chakshus "sight", shrotra "hearing", and manas "thought" (nose, mouth, eyes, ears and mind; ChUp. 2.7.1).In Vedantic philosophy, prana is the notion of a vital, life-sustaining force of living beings and vital energy, comparable to the Chinese notion of Qi. Prana is a central concept in Ayurveda and Yoga, where it is believed to flow through a network of fine subtle channels called nadis. Its most subtle material form is the breath, but it is also to be found in the blood, and its most concentrated form is semen in men and vaginal fluid in women.[1] The Pranamaya-kosha is one of the five Koshas or "sheaths" of the Atman.Prana was first expounded in the Upanishads, where it is part of the worldly, physical realm, sustaining the body and the mother of thought and thus also of the mind. Prana suffuses all living forms but is not itself the Atman or individual soul. In the Ayurveda, the Sun and sunshine are held to be a source of prana.(wiki)

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Been So Long

All I know is my life is equally described in 3 albums that I possess now and they are:

So I've been gone but ...I don't have much to say right now...maybe later.

Saturday, June 4, 2011


Introduction to the chakras
What chakras are and their psychological properties?

Chakras are centers of energy, located on the midline of the body. There are seven of them, and they govern our psychological properties. The chakras located on the lower part of our body are our instinctual side, the highest ones our mental side.

The chakras can have various levels of activity. When they're "open," they're considered operative in a normal fashion.

Ideally, all chakras would contribute to our being. Our instincts would work together with our feelings and thinking. However, this is usually not the case. Some chakras are not open enough (being under-active), and to compensate, other chakras are over-active. The ideal state is where the chakras are balanced. To find out what the state of your chakras is, do the chakra test.

There exist lots of techniques to balance the chakras. Mostly techniques to open chakras are used. It makes no sense to try to make over-active chakras less active, as they are compensating for other chakras. To restore the compensation they'd be over-active again in no time. To stop them from compensating, the chakras they are compensating for must be opened. See the techniques to open chakras.

. 1 - Root chakra

The Root chakra is about being physically there and feeling at home in situations. If it is open, you feel grounded, stable and secure. You don't unnecessarily distrust people. You feel present in the here and now and connected to your physical body. You feel you have sufficient territory.

If you tend to be fearful or nervous, your Root chakra is probably under-active. You'd easily feel unwelcome.

If this chakra is over-active, you may be very materialistic and greedy. You're probably obsessed with being secure and resist change.

. 2 - Sacral chakra

The Sacral chakra is about feeling and sexuality. When it is open, your feelings flow freely, and are expressed without you being over-emotional. You are open to intimacy and you can be passionate and lively. You have no problems dealing with your sexuality.

If you tend to be stiff and unemotional or have a "poker face," the Sacral chakra is under-active. You're not very open to people.

If this chakra is over-active, you tend to be emotional all the time. You'll feel emotionally attached to people and you can be very sexual.

. 3 - Navel chakra

The Navel chakra is about asserting yourself in a group. When it is open, you feel in control and you have sufficient self esteem.

When the Navel chakra is under-active, you tend to be passive and indecisive. You're probably timid and don't get what you want.

If this chakra is over-active, you are domineering and probably even aggressive.

. 4 - Heart chakra

The Heart chakra is about love, kindness and affection. When it is open, you are compassionate and friendly, and you work at harmonious relationships.

When your Heart chakra is under-active, you are cold and distant.

If this chakra is over-active, you are suffocating people with your love and your love probably has quite selfish reasons.

. 5 - Throat chakra

The Throat chakra is about self-expression and talking. When it is open, you have no problems expressing yourself, and you might be doing so as an artist.

When this chakra is under-active, you tend not to speak much, and you probably are introverted and shy. Not speaking the truth may block this chakra.

If this chakra is over-active, you tend to speak too much, usually to domineer and keep people at a distance. You're a bad listener if this is the case.

. 6 - Third Eye chakra

The Third Eye chakra is about insight and visualization. When it is open, you have a good intuition. You may tend to fantasize.

If it is under-active, you're not very good at thinking for yourself, and you may tend to rely on authorities. You may be rigid in your thinking, relying on beliefs too much. You might even get confused easily.

If this chakra is over-active, you may live in a world of fantasy too much. In excessive cases halucinations are possible.

. 7 - Crown chakra

The Crown chakra is about wisdom and being one with the world. When this chakra is open, you are unprejudiced and quite aware of the world and yourself.

If it is under-active, you're not very aware of spirituality. You're probably quite rigid in your thinking.

If this chakra is over-active, you are probably intellectualizing things too much. You may be addicted to spirituality and are probably ignoring your bodily needs.

Monday, May 30, 2011

The scariest part in being loved by someone is the uncertainty that they may stop anytime.

But I have this innate feeling that since I can never loathe something one hundred percent...I must hold love for it. And with that I am going to have love for him for a very long time. I wish things could have changed magically. I don't want to live a lie..so I guess this has come to an end of either a illusional cycle of beginnings. I get really hollowed and contradictingly(real word?) sad inside. Last night , after the call I made s many thousands of times...I still didn't get that sense that this time if you gave him a chance he might change..things might actually go in your direction..then I glance momentarily into my future and realized because things might not actually change I can not ... give him another chance...I am losing energy and gaining death. Like I am spending energy writing this post bcause I feel like I need to release this stress from my chest and uplift my soul.

But then there is.....

especially my feelings. I wish I could say it before its all too late.
I have this tough exterior that seems to sabotage me and save me from the hurt that comes anyway. If life is love....When did life become so difficult? or maybe the simplicity of it all is just not setting well with me in this stage of life...or even less advanced ...I might not fully understand love...but can you ever? So many bad titles its received...can or will I ever come to know it at first chance without being judgmental about who and what love is.

I need to make my bed....or get in it.....
no no
I need to make my bed and make my life choices as much as possible.

sn: I want him back.But differently. I want him to be unpredictable....communicating....open-minded.....happy/positive...... humorous....non-secretive.....and everything else I had in mind....but i'm being selfish.

Psychedelic experience are only a glimpse of genuine mystical insight, but a glimpse which can be matured and deepened by the various ways of meditation in which drugs are no longer necessary or useful…psychedelic drugs are simply instruments, like microscopes, telescopes, and telephones. The biologist does not sit with eye permanently glued to the microscope, he goes away and works on what he has seen. --Alan Watts

Saturday, May 28, 2011

10 Things I Want To Say To A Black Woman by Joshua Bennett

Joshua Bennett

I’d first like to say all women are beautiful from every nationality. This is nothing against any other nationality.

1. I wish I could put your voice in jar, wait for those lonely winter nights when I forget what God sounds like, run to the nearest maximum security prison and open it. Watch the notes that bounce off the walls like ricocheted bullets, punching keyholes into the sternums of every brother in the room, skeletons opening, rose blossom beautiful to remind you that the way to a black man’s heart is not through his stomach, it is through the heaven in your ‘hello’; the echo of unborn galaxies that pounces forth from your vocal cords, that melts ice grills into oceans, baptizing our lips, and so harsh words fade from our memories, and we forget why we stopped calling you divine in the first place.

2. When I was born my mother’s smile was so bright, it knocked the air from my lungs, and I haven’t been able to breathe right since. It’s something about the way light dances off your teeth, the way the moon gets jealous when you mock her crescent figure with the shape of your mouth. Queen, you make the sky insecure, self-conscious for being forced to stare at your face every morning and realize that the blues of her skin was painted by that symphony doing cartwheels on your tongue.

3. Who else can make kings out of bastards, turn a fatherless Christmas into a floor full of gifts and a kitchen that smells like the Lord is coming tomorrow, and we must eat well tonight. I used to think my sister was a blacksmith, the way she baked fire and metal and made kitchen miracles at fourteen, making enough food to feed a little boy who didn’t have the words to say how much she meant to him back then, or enough backbone to say so the day he turned twenty.

4. Your skin reminds me of everything beautiful I have ever known: the colour of ink on a page, the earth we walk on and the cross that hung my Saviour.

5. I’ve seen you crucified too, spread out on billboards to be spiritually impaled by millions of men with eyes like nails, who made mothers of your daughters; so I’m sorry for the music deals, for Justin Timberlake at the Superbowl, and that young man on the corner this morning, who made you undershade your flesh and become invisible. Never doubt, he only insults you because, men are confused. Now we are trained to destroy or conquer everything we see from birth.

6. If I ever see Don Imus in public I will punch him in the face, one time for every member of the Rutgers and Tennessee Women Basketball Teams. Then I’ll show him a picture of Phylicia Rashad, Assata Shakur, Arthur Kit, my mother, my grandmother and my seven-year-old niece, who’s got eyes like firebombs, and then dare him to tell me that black women are only beautiful in one shade of skin.

7. You are like a sunrise in a nation at war; you remind people that there is always something worth waiting up to.

8. When we are married I will cook, do the dishes and whatever else it takes to let you know that traditional gender roles have no place in the home we build; so my last name is an option, babysitting the kids a treat we split equally, and our bed will be an ancient temple where I construct altars of wax on the small of your back. We make love like the sky is falling, moving to the rhythm of bedsprings and Bell Biv DeVoe. Angels applauding in unison, saying this is the way it was meant to be.

9. My daughter will know her father’s face from the day she is born, and I can only pray that the superman complex lasts long enough for me deflect the pain this world will aim at her from the moment she is old enough to realize that the colour brown is still not considered human most places. But my daughter will have a smile like a wheelchair, and so even when I am at my worst, when the Kryptonite of this putrid planet threatens to render me grounded, the light dancing off of her teeth, will transform the shards of my broken body into heart-shaped blackbirds, taking flight on a wing that reminds me of my Saviour’s hands, my daughter’s smile, my mother’s laugh when I was in her womb.

10. Never stop pushing, this world needs you now more than ever…

Who taught you to hate the color of your skin? Who taught you to hate the texture of your hair? Who taught you to hate the shape of your nose and the shape of your lips? Who taught you to hate yourself from the top of your head to the soles of your feet? Who taught you to hate your own kind? Who taught you to hate the race that you belong to so much so that you don’t want to be around each other?
-malcolm x

Another Magical Man has Pasted Away....

His spoken word pieces of the 1970s are considered to have influenced what would later become the genres of hip-hop and neo-soul.

Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2011/05/28/gil-scott-heron-godfather-rap-dies-new-york-hospital/#ixzz1NceBE0hG

i'm not a supported of fox news though....

Gil Scott-Heron - 'Me And The Devil' (Official HD Video)

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

When there is nothing transformational that has ever changed the cycle of energy....you realize its dead. Dead things bring no life to those who participate in it.

The most crucial war....where casualties on either side are dangerous to SELF.

I just realized that I just need a lot of alone time.
I knew for a while now that I needed alone time, I'm not really just realizing it.
Coming home that day and feeling like a big giant sack of poop and not having any energy to do anything but climb into the shower and roll into bed because I was and still am in dis-belief.

A l o n e.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Long Time

I mean to update this blog but I'm usually occupied with real life moments.
This blog was suppose to be a sort of release for me...a place where I could be real when real life seemed tobe a dark fantasy. It was also a semi-glimpse of who I am and what I aspire to be...in simply just being .....but I was wrong.

And it takes a some growing and a lot of lessons called mistakes to realize when you were wrong.
Were because you can sense when you might be going in the right direction which is often left in the shades of grey and blue....

I have changed nicely...I would think........I feel a bit calm amongst the drama that entices and tries to choke my life.....

My fortune cookie I had in Atlanta said " You will soon make a long overdue personal decision"
I believe I am making it.
There have been many a signs pointing to this moment of yesterday.
Its not as hard as I thought it would be ...because I know I have to do it.

I deserve I chance at happiness and supreme love.
If it is my energy I must change and channel than so be it. I must make some changes in my life...

I need positivity in my life..I need to grow....

I need to shift a lot of channels and create a sphere of plus signs creating a gate of protection from lies and deceit.

I say this as pure as possible..no influences at the current moment and not trying to appease to false depicters...I'm searching for the inner light under the pollution of unnaturality within society....I'll get there with the help of love....immense love of all around me....so for now...I'm just sliding through frozen time....this moment belongs to me....

Erykah Badu- Sometimes

I stopped asking why I get hurt. I stopped looking for who. I stopped asking where I went wrong. I stopped asking what did I do. I stopped asking when things would be better. I replaced all these with the most important question : How can I bring change [=

Monday, May 23, 2011

“It's not what we eat but what we digest that makes us strong; not what we gain but what we save that makes us rich; not what we read but what we remember that makes us learned; and not what we profess but what we practice that gives us integrity.”-SFB

Sunday, May 22, 2011

look at me...
love thee.
form free
free formed head
mind of play doh
but i don't play though
you have a yo-yo
word to ye-yo