Dearest Khalifah,
What to even say? And then to look on the brighter side although it is so hard to find ..what is there not to say? You were so beautiful. Majestic.Outstanding.Lovely.Funny.Smart.PoliticallyRight.Spiritual.Faithful.Loveable.Kind.Creative. and every other adjective that’s full of light and purpose..they are all you.and so effing soulful…I love you soo much. God knows. The Creator and you can now see my pain… I wish although these wishes are too late or…just in time, I wish we could have hung out more. I wish yesterday wasn’t the last time we spoke. But is it truly the last time we will speak because I still hear you little voice=] I still feel how big you were going to blow up. You like all other greats was set out to change the world. In fact, I think you did. I asked God nicely on June 19th when Tiana died to please spare me another heartbreak. But the Creator had other plans…plans that no matter how many books I read , how many places I travel, how much money I get, how many materials I possess foolishly…still, I will not understand. You see I was so anxious to read my e-mail of your ideas..and at my job in India I got a chance to go on the computer so I checked and there it was and then I went on Twitter and naturally there was you “@NappyHeadHI – I sent it” but then I looked on FaceBook and all the other tweets and I said dear God PLEASE , not somebody I know. I look in utter confusion and denial at another face that is TOO familiar. You’re going to watch over me I hope. As you ccan see it took me a while to open that e-mail…I’m scared. I’m really scared. I asked God so many times today am I next. If I am I guess its no use in fighting..it’ll be my time but I feel as if I have so much to do. ..but I’m no judge.God Blessyou and your brother…your family is hurting but I know they will be strong. Due to their wishes and due to the light, I shall celebrate your life. Khalifah, I really want you to come back. I really meant I would give both my kidneys for you and Tiana..tell her I said “Hey Girl Hey” lol . Dag. We were both kings lol. Except I was always questionable because I’m a girl. I know both my kidneys can never be enough for the worth of your soul and I guess there is nothing I have that can bribe God..but if I did and if God had one weakness like chocolate or ice cream or a new shirt or something …I’d buy and sell it just for you to come back. Too amazing for words. I’m just thinking of all the things you had planned. But don’t even sweat it. Shapel is definitely go through with your plans. I’ll keep that creativity you always had alive. Those films we were about to collab on…picture them done..and done with love. Cause that’s what I’mma do put so much love and care while keeping it true. Just like you. Khalifah, I’m learning, I’m growing and God I’m loving. Still.
Ps: I’mma see you on the deck realll soon*
I love you and You , Khalifah live inside of me,
Shapel
No comments:
Post a Comment